Addiction is something that had taken over my life for 8 years. From the time I began doing drugs, at 15 years old until the time I stopped, at 23 years old, there wasn’t a day I didn’t think about getting high. Being clean over 7 years now, I still have days where I want to do drugs. The cravings never really go away. Yes, there are days which are easier than others, but the struggle is still there. I am still working my program and using the recovery tools I learned so many years ago. Out of everything I learned, there is one recovery tool that has helped me more than so many others and that is juicing. There are some amazing health benefits to juicing, not only physically but mentally and emotionally as well. I do have to admit, juicing is one of the things that helped me to get over my drug addiction.
Table of Contents
Who I Am
Who I am. That is a question I have had to ask myself over and over again since I got clean over 7 years ago. It has been a struggle getting to know the real me and some days, I still have to work on this. Regardless, I am a mother of three beautiful children, who I am very grateful for. I am a wife, a sister, a daughter and a friend. I am also a grateful recovering addict. If it weren’t for my recovery, I don’t know if I would still be alive today.
My days are filled with writing. I love to write just about anything from song lyrics to books to blogs and more. Writing is my passion and it is one of the recovery tools that helped me to overcome my drug addiction as well. In fact, writing is what led me to juicing in the first place. When I was getting out of the rehabilitation treatment centers, I knew I couldn’t go back to my old habits. I started researching everything I could about living a healthier lifestyle. In addition to using the recovery tools I had learned in rehab, I also found out that juicing could provide amazing benefits to recovering addicts.
Another part of who I am is spreading knowledge to others. I enjoy helping others overcome their addiction and live the best life they possibly can. I am hoping by sharing my story that others will see, they can also be free from an addictive lifestyle. They can have hope and succeed in recovery from their addiction, just as I have.
How I Got Started with Drugs
My story of how I got started with drugs is a sad and terrifying one. However, I have shared it many times to give hope to others who feel they are stuck in life. There are so many people who think they must abuse alcohol or drugs to hide their emotions. That is what I did for so many years.
The trauma in my life is what led me to do drugs. When I was a child, there was sexual abuse from a babysitter, who was also a relative. When I was 15, I was also raped. This sexual abuse trauma caused a lot of self-hate, shame and guilt. I felt so alone at the time and once I first did drugs, I knew that was a way to hide those feelings. I no longer had to suffer with those emotions or feel like I didn’t matter. There was a way to mask all of that and get away.
From the very first time of using drugs, I was hooked. It seemed like the ultimate solution. In my mind at the time, what were a few drugs to cover up those emotions. It was nothing compared to the suffering I had been through.
How Drugs Affected My Life
I was entirely wrong. At the time, I didn’t feel as if drugs were going to become problem in my life. Using drugs was a solution, how could it be a problem? I will tell you how. Everything in my life was affected.
At the age of 15, I was a great student. After I began using drugs, things got worse. Yes, I still passed most of my classes, but my grades weren’t as good as they could have been. From there, I started losing some of my friends and stopped spending as much time with my family. In addition, I had my first job at 17 years which only lasted a few months. I was too high and too drunk to care about keeping my job. I also had my first child at 17 years old as well.
When I turned 21 years old and after I had my second child, I got my first OWI. I didn’t even phase me, since I had only gotten non-reporting probation and fines. That didn’t seem to be enough to get me back on track with my life. I kept using and things only got worse. There were so many nights when I couldn’t remember things after waking up. I ended up at people’s houses and couldn’t remember how I got there. After my first OWI, my husband at the time divorced me.
At 23 years of age, I had gotten my second OWI and that finally turned things around for me. By this time, I had my 3rd child and I was with my now husband. I can’t say that things weren’t very dark in our relationship early on. I made many mistakes, but he hung in there.
Since 2011, I have been clean and while I can’t imagine my life any other way, I still try reminding myself how terribly drugs affected my life. They affected my schooling, job, family relationships, intimate relationships, how I parented my children and how I lived every aspect of my life. I am so grateful to be clean and sober now.
Moment I Realized I Needed to Change
The moment I realized I needed to change was the night I got my 2nd DUI. I was out partying as usual. It was the same kind of night I had many times before. My friends, some of my family members and I were out “having fun”. When it was nearing 3 a.m. and most of the people were ready to head home, I went that route as well. That was until one of my friends called, who stayed out, and asked me for a ride home. I turned around and told them I would be right there. It wasn’t a question, I would have done anything for this person.
After I picked them up and started heading towards their house to drop them off, they noticed I was swerving and offered to drive. I agreed and got out of the vehicle. They started driving and noticed a police officer following far behind us. At that point, they jumped out of the vehicle and ran away. I got into the driver seat and kept driving towards my house. There were probably about 3 miles until my house. When I got to the stop light (which was green by the way), I stopped, not thinking or in the right state of mind, of course. The lights and sirens started going off. I pulled into the gas station and the policeman had me doing the sobriety test and I completely failed it big time. Was that when I realized I needed to change? No, not yet.
He took me to jail and I spent the night there. However, at my sentencing I didn’t get any more jail time. I only got probation, fines and Impact Weekend. The Impact Weekend is was the moment I realized things needed to change in my life. Most of the people who attended Impact Weekend made a joke of it and acted like there was no reason they needed to be there. However, everything the leaders were saying hit home for me, and it changed my entire view on my addiction and what I needed to be doing with my life.
How I Use Juicing and Rehab to Get Over My Drug Addiction
In addition to all the recovery tools I have learned to use, juicing and rehab also helped me get over my drug addiction. My stay in rehab was a long one but well worth it. There wasn’t any part of me that thought I shouldn’t be there. I was fully ready to turn things around. I attended and participated in all my therapy sessions. Every activity they had in the rehab, I took part in. When I finally went home from rehab, I started exercising, eating healthier, getting myself on a schedule, juicing and getting a good amount of sleep every night. I enjoy juicing because it gives me something to do with the prepping and all. However, it also gives me the vitamins I need from vegetables and fruits. Since I don’t particularly like eating fruits, this is a wonderful way to get them. From everything I learned in rehab and the healthy habits I have taken on, including juicing, I believe I will have a long and happy recovering lifestyle.
My Life After Being Clean
What happened after I got clean from drugs? So, many things are different in my life. I couldn’t have imagined a life like this when I was using drugs and alcohol to cover up the pain from my past. I couldn’t have imagined happiness, relaxation and enjoyment in my life. However, it is quite nice feeling free for once without having to abuse drugs or alcohol.
I am happily married to the same man who put up with me through my 2nd OWI. He and I have been through a lot, but we are working on our issues and sticking together. Our 3 children get quality time with me, since I am not out getting high and drunk. I have kept a stable, work-at-home job, since the end of 2013. I am a writer, which is my passion, so it works out wonderfully for me. When I was clean from drugs and alcohol for 1 year, I published my own book called Overcoming Any Addiction: Finding the Inner You. I am working on writing my 2nd book.
Being clean feels wonderful and my life is great. Yes, I still have issues, but I continue to work the 12 steps, journal, keep juicing and making healthy choices for my life. It is a lifestyle I wouldn’t trade in for anything. Not having drugs and alcohol in my life has allowed me to set up goals and achieve them. It has allowed me to strive for what I used to see as impossible. I get to be grateful for all the things I have in my life and I am even grateful I had to deal with an addiction in the first place. It made me so much stronger.
Being a recovering addict myself, I can say, there is always hope. My life had looked grim from the time I was a little child, around 8 years old, until the time I was 23. When I first started using drugs and got hooked, I didn’t think there was any other way to solve my problems. I was wrong. I am hoping by sharing my story that others who have become addicted to drugs can get the help they need. For those who haven’t started abusing drugs yet, but struggle with something in their life, I hope they get the help they need before an addiction does develop.
Cara Havens is a self-employed writer, focusing on addiction and recovery. She has a passion for writing and owns Capital Content Creations, a content writing company. With one published book, called Overcoming Any Addiction: Finding the Inner You and another book on the way, being a grateful recovering addict is something to be proud of.